Tuesday, December 9, 2014
" WHERE TO FIND ENCOURAGEMENT IN THE MIDST OF DARKNESS "
In this age and time, it is difficult to rely on anyone. Not on Family, Friends or even The Church, if you go
to one! I have always been open minded as to stay positive even in the midst of crisis.
How do I do it? By staying Logical and Knowing the facts that when things can go wrong, they always go
wrong! This is why I mentioned Damage Prevention in one of my blogs. Most idiots will call it Paranoia.
Well, I am not an idiot as most can assure others!
My Mentor, who is now gone taught me about that word.
I never knew what to call my methods, that I had followed since I was 21 years of age, when I decided not
to be like everyone else. Even if I wanted to be similar to others, it never worked out.
I was Me and I was Unique, so why try to change something I cannot? The crazy part of this, is that You
are exactly like that... Unique!
You don't have to listen to shit and scams. You don't have to feel guilty or shame.
Finally, you certainly do not have to Fear anything. After all, what can you lose by trying to do a good thing?
Finding Encouragement in the midst of darkness, is no easy task. I know, because that has been the story of
my life... No one ever believed in anything I wanted to do or could do. Now, I see it as a joke, because
those people were so afraid of getting out-shined! I remember the first time I had mentioned about writing
my first book, my so called friends and acquaintances replied with a smile and silence. Others patronized me
and told me that they were also writing a book! Yeah right! I couldn't use a computer then, so I hand wrote
it in a very pretty book, I had purchased, especially for that purpose. I knew the rest of them laughed at me
but I did not care!
It took me ten years to complete that book! Now, Amazon has it and the rest who hear that I actually
completed the book are all so nice to me! I feel like telling them, they haven't seen nothing yet! But what for?
I keep those kind of hurtful memories as a Reminder, who Believed in me sincerely and who did not!
I have done Everything I said I would do since I was 18 years of age.
I wanted to become a Vocalist, Dancer, Choreographer, Actress, Martial Arts, Nail Artist, Designer,
Body-Builder, and a Writer. I have even Preached at 2 churches, which can open a door to many other
Not once, did I have the complete and utter sincere support of anyone I knew, except for Myself.
Sure, some wanted me to make it but they had their own selfish reasons! Not once, was I fooled by the
charming words of the many! And you know what?, That is Okay! It feels better not to owe anyone!
I often had to dig deep inside of me, to find something I could feel positive about during dark times.
I promised myself when I turned Twenty-one years old, that I will Not sell myself out and I have not!
I also promised myself, that I will not dream about some big time Producer or anything like that to fool me
into thinking I will make it Big! I said I will accomplish all my dreams and make it, that's all!
Accomplish is Making It! Forget about the Big bullshit dreams, so many will offer you, especially when
you are a Female!
If you are in a dark place and have no clue how to get out? Don't get out!
Why don't you Master that Dark Place, and give it your touch of Uniqueness? Don't worry, the darkness
cannot stay dark. Your eyes will adjust and it will just be another Dim place, that you can say you have been
to and decorated with your lovely presence!
Dig deep as you sit in that pit...
Dig for the little nice and kind things that a stranger may have told you, when you were younger?
Dig for the silly things, you had done, that made others laugh?
Dig for all the small things you were able to accomplish, no matter how menial they were!
Dig for the tears and hurts that helped you get to this dark place to begin with, I bet you'll find a way out!
Dig for a face, you would like to look at with healthy Pride, once you do climb out of that pit!
Dig for that one person, you can dedicate your Win to!
I say Dig, because it will be that much more difficult, every time you slip and fall into that pit.
Do not be afraid of the pit, it was your creation, Remember?
If you cannot Dig right away? Don't worry about it, Sit and Cry it out!
You will Dig, once your Spirit decides it's time to Dig!
I hope This helps anyone, who maybe going through a dark time right now. I would imagine many are,
It is the Christmas Holidays coming up and so many are sad, including myself.
I do wish Everyone a Solution to whatever Problem, they maybe going through...
Much Love And Peace To All!
Friday, December 5, 2014
" HOW A WOMAN CAN GAIN RESPECT FROM MEN OF EVERY BACKGROUND "
It's been said that "To be treated like a Lady, One must act like a lady". I am not sure I agree with that
and I will tell you why... It doesn't take much to Act like a lady. All you must do is speak properly,
wear a dress and do a lot of Pretending! In my own interpretation of being a Lady, it means a whole
lot more than them few attributes. To be treated like a Lady, which means to be Respected, calls
for the woman to be Deserving of it. So, if you ask me, I would say...
"To be treated like a Lady, the woman must Deserved it and Demand it!"
I have many male friends, from different backgrounds and nationalities that I trust will agree with
what I am about to write...
One night, out of curiosity, I thought I would ask as many as I could why they Respected me so
much! (Yes, of course I already knew why, but I wanted confirmation from them!)
I was able to ask about 30-40 male friends of mine and to my delight, their answers were all very
similar. Instead of telling you what and how they told me, I think it would be more helpful to write
them down in point form. I will not write it in any special order, but what comes to mind, as I write.
I will go from A-Z and no more than that!
"How a woman can gain respect from men of every background"
a) Always make eye contact upon your first introduction and extend your hand and shake his,
firmly with a smile.
b) Don't allow the man to belittle your womanhood with a stupid joke to cover his insecurity.
"Oh my God, are you trying to break my hand?" (That's when you write him off as a Dufis and tell him "Yes, I must Break You!" Watch him run for his life!) I tell you this, because that has happened to me a few times and then I replied with the "I must Break You!" line. Since then, it has never happened to me again! I've been complimented by it but no more idiotic remarks!
Remember...If you let him get away with it belittling jokes even once? He will do it again and again!
c) Be comfortable in your own skin. Never mind, what the world thinks looks sexy. It's what you think looks and feels sexy that matters, even if that means wearing a potato sack! If you feel beautiful in something? then you will exude that to the rest of the world.
d) Know how to Laugh at Tragedies. Be able to Discuss things of all topics without getting emotional.
e) Don't be afraid to share stories and don't play the victim. Real men secretly desire to have a strong woman and not some wimpy bag of emotional wreck, waiting to be rescued and looked after!
f) Quit asking for things in life, that you, yourself cannot deliver or give to a man! Please quit expecting that the world will give you anything because you have a pretty face or a sexy body!
The world owes you nothing! You owe the world to make a positive difference in your own life and in others.
g) If the man wants to talk about sex in a decent manner, allow him to. You can learn a lot about a man by how he expresses himself that way. However, if he gets outta hand? Let him know gently and walk away. If that doesn't work, Call me. :)
h) Never become a Nag!
i) Never let him see you jealous, unless he has given you a reason to be and explain that reason nicely. (This is only if you are already in a relationship)
j) Don't act tough...
k) Be appreciative and considerate of other women and men.
l) Try not to be judgemental. If you cannot, then keep quiet.
m) Let him see you are not afraid to fight for your convictions and with reasons as to why!
n) Never patronize a man. Men are far from being stupid... Why do you think Rich men use money to buy most women? Because they know, they can!
o) Don't try to make a man jealous, it only confirms his bad experiences with past relationships and that women should not be trusted. Either way, you will lose him sooner or later.
p) Never Betray a man. They do not Forgive well.
q) Never belittle a man, always find encouraging words to help him make the correct choice for himself, even if that means you must leave the picture!
s) Never let a man dictate what you can or cannot do, within reason. Things should be discussed and agreed upon. No trial and error. It's called Damage Prevention.
t) Agree to be Protective of the relationship based on Respect.
u) Never let any man, be disrespected by another man, in front of other men!
v) Never let a man disrespect another woman, in front of you!
w) Never disrespect other women in front of men!
x) Don't try to act sexy by the lack of clothes you wear, It's actually more alluring when they cannot see too much skin!
y) Never sleep with them after drinks, first date, or because you feel you owe him anything!
z) Look into their eyes, Listen to their words, Feel their Spirit and decide if they are Friendship material or more than that. If friendship material, then Never cross that line! I can guarantee you that you will gain Respect as a True Lady and not a Fake!
Thursday, December 4, 2014
" HOW TO CHARM A STRONG WOMAN, IF YOU REALLY WANT HER "
Notice that I made mention of you really wanting her? There is a reason for that and I will address
it later. First of all, many are confused, as to what a strong woman really is! I am not speaking about
just physical strength, but of mind, heart and soul! It doesn't matter what you don't have, what
matters is how you connect with her mentally and spiritually. The sex is purely the physical
affirmation and should not be used as contest for her talent! Men are always attracted to beautiful
women, but do they even know or value what she is in the inside?
Don't get me wrong, not every woman is good, just like not every man is bad. Men and women are
two different species that need to be able to communicate on a higher level than just physical or
If you are a man who loves a strong woman and would like to charm her, I can give you some tips!
Now, understand that I am not your Ordinary strong woman...
I am very keen as to how men fish for women! During my 20's I learned how many mind games
men like to play and they play to win. They offer gifts of enticements along with promises that
they never planned on fulfilling! I watched my female friends go through so much, because they fell
for a man that wanted them for their Strength in their line of work, Their ability to speak well and
can command attention everywhere they go.
I watched and learned the tricks men think will work and some did! I also watched how devastated
the woman became, when things did not work out!
Here's my advice...
Never try to get her in bed too soon, even if she invites you to her place, say 'NO'
Never bullshit her with big promises, she knows you will not be able to deliver.
Never try to be better than you are by putting other men down!
Never Push her to make a choice, as she can do all those things and have done them before you came
Never comment negatively on anything that she might feel insecure with. Teasing will just make her
angry! Last but not least...
Never make her jealous!
As the man, you must show her Respect and treat her like the Lady she is!
Always open the car door for her and Be a Gentleman! You'd be surprised to see how good that
feels! Communicate with her and don't be afraid. She will sense your sincerity and she will
Love you for that!
As far as the sex part... Make sure to show her that you aim to Satisfy her before yourself.
If you are a generous lover, you will gain points! Do not ask her about her past, unless she wants
to tell you, but open up first and show her that a Real Man, is a man, that can Face the past and then
move on! Compliment her every day and give her soft kisses, that could lead to more,
But let her Lead!
As far as what I wrote earlier about 'really wanting her', You better know for sure what you're getting
yourself into! Strong women can get very Angry and act like psychos! Don't be fooled by the calm
demeanor of Cool Calm and Collected. You piss her off and you could get beat on or even castrated
by her angry words! She can be cunning and trust me that every strong woman remembers everything
you've ever done to wrong in her eyes!
Depending on her true nature, she will either wish you well or wish you hell....
More on this topic later, for all the good men out there!