" Where to find Encouragement in the midst of Darkness... "

                     " WHERE TO FIND ENCOURAGEMENT IN THE MIDST OF DARKNESS "


In this age and time, it is difficult to rely on anyone. Not on Family, Friends or even The Church, if you go

to one! I have always been open minded as to stay positive even in the midst of crisis.

How do I do it? By staying Logical and Knowing the facts that when things can go wrong, they always go

wrong! This is why I mentioned Damage Prevention in one of my blogs. Most idiots will call it Paranoia.

Well, I am not an idiot as most can assure others!


My Mentor, who is now gone taught me about that word.

I never knew what to call my methods, that I had followed since I was 21 years of age, when I decided not

to be like everyone else. Even if I wanted to be similar to others, it never worked out.

I was Me and I was Unique, so why try to change something I cannot? The crazy part of this, is that You

are exactly like that... Unique!

You don't have to listen to shit and scams. You don't have to feel guilty or shame.

Finally, you certainly do not have to Fear anything. After all, what can you lose by trying to do a good thing?


Finding Encouragement in the midst of darkness, is no easy task. I know, because that has been the story of

my life... No one ever believed in anything I wanted to do or could do. Now, I see it as a joke, because

those people were so afraid of getting out-shined! I remember the first time I had mentioned about writing

my first book, my so called friends and acquaintances replied with a smile and silence. Others patronized me

and told me that they were also writing a book! Yeah right! I couldn't use a computer then, so I hand wrote

it in a very pretty book, I had purchased, especially for that purpose. I knew the rest of them laughed at me

but I did not care!

It took me ten years to complete that book! Now, Amazon has it and the rest who hear that I actually

completed the book are all so nice to me! I feel like telling them, they haven't seen nothing yet! But what for?


I keep those kind of hurtful memories as a Reminder, who Believed in me sincerely and who did not!

I have done Everything I said I would do since I was 18 years of age.

I wanted to become a Vocalist, Dancer, Choreographer, Actress, Martial Arts, Nail Artist, Designer,

Body-Builder, and a Writer. I have even Preached at 2 churches, which can open a door to many other

things.

Not once, did I have the complete and utter sincere support of anyone I knew, except for Myself.

Sure, some wanted me to make it but they had their own selfish reasons! Not once, was I fooled by the

charming words of the many! And you know what?, That is Okay! It feels better not to owe anyone!


I often had to dig deep inside of me, to find something I could feel positive about during dark times.

I promised myself when I turned Twenty-one years old, that I will Not sell myself out and I have not!

I also promised myself, that I will not dream about some big time Producer or anything like that to fool me

into thinking I will make it Big! I said I will accomplish all my dreams and make it, that's all!

Accomplish is Making It! Forget about the Big bullshit dreams, so many will offer you, especially when

you are a Female!


If you are in a dark place and have no clue how to get out? Don't get out!

Why don't you Master that Dark Place, and give it your touch of Uniqueness? Don't worry, the darkness

cannot stay dark. Your eyes will adjust and it will just be another Dim place, that you can say you have been

to and decorated with your lovely presence!


Dig deep as you sit in that pit...

Dig for the little nice and kind things that a stranger may have told you, when you were younger?

Dig for the silly things, you had done, that made others laugh?

Dig for all the small things you were able to accomplish, no matter how menial they were!

Dig for the tears and hurts that helped you get to this dark place to begin with, I bet you'll find a way out!

Dig for a face, you would like to look at with healthy Pride, once you do climb out of that pit!

Dig for that one person, you can dedicate your Win to!


I say Dig, because it will be that much more difficult, every time you slip and fall into that pit.

Do not be afraid of the pit, it was your creation, Remember?

If you cannot Dig right away? Don't worry about it, Sit and Cry it out!

You will Dig, once your Spirit decides it's time to Dig!

I hope This helps anyone, who maybe going through a dark time right now. I would imagine many are,

It is the Christmas Holidays coming up and so many are sad, including myself.

I do wish Everyone a Solution to whatever Problem, they maybe going through...


Much Love And Peace To All!  

" How a Woman can gain Respect from Men of every background "

           " HOW A WOMAN CAN GAIN RESPECT FROM MEN OF EVERY BACKGROUND "


It's been said that "To be treated like a Lady, One must act like a lady". I am not sure I agree with that

and I will tell you why... It doesn't take much to Act like a lady. All you must do is speak properly,

wear a dress and do a lot of Pretending! In my own interpretation of being a Lady, it means a whole

lot more than them few attributes. To be treated like a Lady, which means to be Respected, calls

for the woman to be Deserving of it. So, if you ask me, I would say...

"To be treated like a Lady, the woman must Deserved it and Demand it!"


I have many male friends, from different backgrounds and nationalities that I trust will agree with

what I am about to write...

One night, out of curiosity, I thought I would ask as many as I could why they Respected me so

much! (Yes, of course I already knew why, but I wanted confirmation from them!)


I was able to ask about 30-40 male friends of mine and to my delight, their answers were all very

similar. Instead of telling you what and how they told me, I think it would be more helpful to write

them down in point form. I will not write it in any special order, but what comes to mind, as I write.

I will go from A-Z and no more than that!



"How a woman can gain respect from men of every background"

a) Always make eye contact upon your first introduction and extend your hand and shake his,
firmly with a smile.

b) Don't allow the man to belittle your womanhood with a stupid joke to cover his insecurity.
Example:
"Oh my God, are you trying to break my hand?" (That's when you write him off as a Dufis and tell him "Yes, I must Break You!" Watch him run for his life!) I tell you this, because that has happened to me a few times and then I replied with the "I must Break You!" line. Since then, it has never happened to me again! I've been complimented by it but no more idiotic remarks!
Remember...If you let him get away with it belittling jokes even once? He will do it again and again!

c) Be comfortable in your own skin. Never mind, what the world thinks looks sexy. It's what you think looks and feels sexy that matters, even if that means wearing a potato sack! If you feel beautiful in something? then you will exude that to the rest of the world.

d) Know how to Laugh at Tragedies. Be able to Discuss things of all topics without getting emotional.

e) Don't be afraid to share stories and don't play the victim. Real men secretly desire to have a strong woman and not some wimpy bag of emotional wreck, waiting to be rescued and looked after!

f) Quit asking for things in life, that you, yourself cannot deliver or give to a man! Please quit expecting that the world will give you anything because you have a pretty face or a sexy body!
The world owes you nothing! You owe the world to make a positive difference in your own life and in others.

g) If the man wants to talk about sex in a decent manner, allow him to. You can learn a lot about a man by how he expresses himself that way. However, if he gets outta hand? Let him know gently and walk away. If that doesn't work, Call me. :)

h) Never become a Nag!

i) Never let him see you jealous, unless he has given you a reason to be and explain that reason nicely. (This is only if you are already in a relationship)

j) Don't act tough...

k) Be appreciative and considerate of other women and men.

l) Try not to be judgemental. If you cannot, then keep quiet.

m) Let him see you are not afraid to fight for your convictions and with reasons as to why!

n) Never patronize a man. Men are far from being stupid... Why do you think Rich men use money to buy most women? Because they know, they can!

o) Don't try to make a man jealous, it only confirms his bad experiences with past relationships and that women should not be trusted. Either way, you will lose him sooner or later.

p) Never Betray a man. They do not Forgive well.

q) Never belittle a man, always find encouraging words to help him make the correct choice for himself, even if that means you must leave the picture!

s) Never let a man dictate what you can or cannot do, within reason. Things should be discussed and agreed upon. No trial and error. It's called Damage Prevention.

t) Agree to be Protective of the relationship based on Respect.

u) Never let any man, be disrespected by another man, in front of other men!

v) Never let a man disrespect another woman, in front of you!

w) Never disrespect other women in front of men!

x) Don't try to act sexy by the lack of clothes you wear, It's actually more alluring when they cannot see too much skin!

y) Never sleep with them after drinks, first date, or because you feel you owe him anything!

z) Look into their eyes, Listen to their words, Feel their Spirit and decide if they are Friendship material or more than that. If friendship material, then Never cross that line! I can guarantee you that you will gain Respect as a True Lady and not a Fake!

" How to charm a Strong woman, if you really want her"

                    " HOW TO CHARM A STRONG WOMAN, IF YOU REALLY WANT HER "


Notice that I made mention of you really wanting her? There is a reason for that and I will address

it later. First of all, many are confused, as to what a strong woman really is! I am not speaking about

just physical strength, but of mind, heart and soul! It doesn't matter what you don't have, what

matters is how you connect with her mentally and spiritually. The sex is purely the physical

affirmation and should not be used as contest for her talent! Men are always attracted to beautiful

women, but do they even know or value what she is in the inside?


Don't get me wrong, not every woman is good, just like not every man is bad. Men and women are

two different species that need to be able to communicate on a higher level than just physical or

emotional outbursts.


If you are a man who loves a strong woman and would like to charm her, I can give you some tips!

Now, understand that I am not your Ordinary strong woman...

I am very keen as to how men fish for women! During my 20's I learned how many mind games

men like to play and they play to win. They offer gifts of enticements along with promises that

they never planned on fulfilling! I watched my female friends go through so much, because they fell

for a man that wanted them for their Strength in their line of work, Their ability to speak well and

can command attention everywhere they go.


I watched and learned the tricks men think will work and some did! I also watched how devastated

the woman became, when things did not work out!


Here's my advice...

Never try to get her in bed too soon, even if she invites you to her place, say 'NO'

Never bullshit her with big promises, she knows you will not be able to deliver.

Never try to be better than you are by putting other men down!

Never Push her to make a choice, as she can do all those things and have done them before you came

along!

Never comment negatively on anything that she might feel insecure with. Teasing will just make her

angry! Last but not least...

Never make her jealous!


As the man, you must show her Respect and treat her like the Lady she is!

Always open the car door for her and Be a Gentleman! You'd be surprised to see how good that

feels! Communicate with her and don't be afraid. She will sense your sincerity and she will

Love you for that!


As far as the sex part... Make sure to show her that you aim to Satisfy her before yourself.

If you are a generous lover, you will gain points! Do not ask her about her past, unless she wants

to tell you, but open up first and show her that a Real Man, is a man, that can Face the past and then

move on! Compliment her every day and give her soft kisses, that could lead to more,

But let her Lead!


As far as what I wrote earlier about 'really wanting her', You better know for sure what you're getting

yourself into! Strong women can get very Angry and act like psychos! Don't be fooled by the calm

demeanor of Cool Calm and Collected. You piss her off and you could get beat on or even castrated

by her angry words! She can be cunning and trust me that every strong woman remembers everything

you've ever done to wrong in her eyes!

 Depending on her true nature, she will either wish you well or wish you hell....


More on this topic later, for all the good men out there!

" I am amazed at the stupid mind games, humans play with the opposite sex"

            " OH, THE STUPID MIND GAMES, HUMANS PLAY WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX "



During my 20's, I had never understood how stupid people really are by playing mind games that

they feel will make them seem more intelligent and successful. The bull-shit and big talk about

all that they have done so far in life; The cash they make and the cars and fancy shit they feel make

them a successful person, to me make them look Weak and Foolish!


Regardless of what I have attained in my life, I have never had the desire to use my achievements as

Bragging Rights! I have always Supported and Encouraged every soul, that I have encountered and I

owe Nothing to anyone! Surprisingly and Unbelievably, by this age in life...

There are still a few so called 'men', who got the nerve and stupidity to try and Challenge my

Intelligence, acting as though they are still 18 years of age!


I cannot be bought, manipulated nor made feel guilty because I keep myself 'In Check' at all times!


When someone tells me they want to be Friends, I never reject. I say "I am attached to someone and

I am not looking to be more than friends!" Some of you have experienced this for 30 years with me!

Forever trying to dangle glitter and glam to see if I can be tempted! I have news for you...

I don't care how Macho or Successful, you are... Or how Intelligent. You will not bate me into

anything!


Recently, a person, I thought was a very good friend of mine, who I respected gave me some news

that he wanted more than friendship. I told him, I am not available and reminded him, that he already

knew that I wasn't single before the friendship started.

He kept on with the friendship so I stayed Friendly and Supportive and... Incredibly Understanding!

It was all going well, so I thought but He decided to give me an ultimatum...

Something No one should ever do to someone like me, who Do Right By Everybody!


His ultimatum was for me to give him an answer: Yes or No and not more than that!

So, my answer was "NO".

His reply was: "Then Do not keep in-touch with me".

Does anybody think they know, how that shit made me feel?


Apparently, this bloke does not know and now... He is hounding me with how I made him feel bad

and even Insulted me greatly with something that I will not let anyone get away with!

Here is the mind game, he is playing...

First, Try to make her or him feel guilty

Second: Try to see if she or he will get jealous.

Third: Do anything that will Insult her or him so that she or he must respond to the stimuli

Fourth: Talk badly about her or him to others to see if Anger will work to get her or him back

into contact!


I have news for men such as this guy... "I can let my Former Marine Boyfriend handle your

your ass for the Disrespect, Fortunately for you, He has never given you any worth!

Lucky for you, I know how to handle and dismiss such child play!"


This display of foolishness is only making you look worse! You should have just tried to be real!

The reaction you want from me? Sorry, you will never get that! You wanted to have the last word?

I gave you that Privilege,..

I do that for every idiot I deal with, so don't Flatter yourself!


I have done Right by everyone and have never abandoned nor betrayed, so to be honest with you...

I have no emotions towards a person, who befriended me with his hidden ulterior motives, which

are now too apparent!


I said it once before... " I am No ordinary Female "

I can forgive, understand, have great compassion, will support and encourage every friend I have!

However, Realize that picking a fight or an argument with me, is Illogical and very unwise!

GOVERN YOURSELF ACCORDINGLY!

Latia's Thoughts.....: " Do any of the people you interact with deserve y...

Latia's Thoughts.....: " Do any of the people you interact with deserve y...: " DO ANY OF THE PEOPLE YOU INTERACT WITH DESERVE YOUR TIME AND EFFORT? " This is another irritating question, that we need an...

" Do any of the people you interact with deserve your time and effort? "

" DO ANY OF THE PEOPLE YOU INTERACT WITH DESERVE YOUR TIME AND EFFORT? "



This is another irritating question, that we need and should ask ourselves...


The majority of humans are out-going and want a social life, of some sort. If by chance, they are not,

most of them try very hard to be, due to fear of Loneliness. As for myself, I like spending time alone

and quite enjoy it.

I have tried to enjoy the Fun of being in a social environment...

Laughing at stupid jokes, which I have no understanding of and I have even tried to be in attendance

of simple means, which only led to more attention!  By the time I was in my early 20's, I began to

question the value of this so called Interactions with others in my life.


Using the logical mind that I was blessed with, I realized that Social gatherings were not for me.

Laughing at jokes that were not funny became Foolish to me and a waste of my precious time!

There were only a handful of souls, I cared to understand and relate to, Sometimes, even those few

made me question my presence with them at the time.


I really had to open my mind to see, if this issue stemmed from a bad experience or was it part of my

nature?

My preference towards privacy and isolation made me appear Introverted, even to myself!

What was shocking is that everyone always wanted me to be around and would laugh with me

during each and every conversation. Perhaps, they thought I was Mad?

Perhaps, they enjoyed my Honesty? I really could not tell you why.

All I know is that I get invited out all the time and unless, the person inviting is in my circle of

comfort, I would say no.


However, although I was careful of whom I spent time with, when I did spend time with them,

I always had the urge to question why?

What made that person special enough for me to leave my lovely place of serenity?

I appreciate every single person, I have ever encountered because they deserve to be appreciated for

who they are and that includes even the silly things!

That to me, was a Catalyst in enabling me to change towards Respecting their life as a human.


So much drama and fuss over the silliest things like: Who was the better man or woman.

What people did for a living and how much money do they have or make?

Was there a God and if so, he must be a cruel God to allow so much devastation!


Really? I am expected to participate in a meaningless conversation that would probably lead to an

argument... Oh, No thank You! Keep your opinion to yourself and perversions too!

I have always been an open-minded person and non-judgmental.

It's all good, as long as nobody tries to push anything on me! That is something that will make me

Angry. and for some reason, most do not want to see that happen!


However, every so often, there will be one, who feels that they need to challenge me, on more shit

that is useless to even use as a topic, in a conversation!

I am at fault for being too polite at first and will always try to deflect and derail the speed of drama

that tends to escalate into a debate or an argument.

But Piss me off enough by pushing too far and I will never have a problem castrating egos at large!


Therefore, to answer my own question... Do any of the people I interact with deserve my time and

effort? My answer will have to be: Not a chance! I choose to enjoy them by giving them my time and

effort, otherwise... I'd be deemed completely Mad and a lying hypocrite!


If you are one of my chosen friends, you know that I value your company, because if I did not?

You would certainly not hear from me or see me at the local bar flapping my gums about shit that do

not contribute to an exchange of encouraging words.

Too many negative humans, who think they know everything and so damn judgmental to those less

fortunate than them!


Knowing why you are interacting with certain people is very important to your mental growth,

So think about that and try to forget the shit , most people want to brainwash you with.

My challenge to you is to evaluate your so called circle of trust and friends...

There were so much more I wanted to add to this post but time is up!


Be careful of those who flatter you with Insincerity. It will lead you to a path that you wish you'd

never gone on!

" Could you have made a better choice at the time? "

                          " COULD YOU HAVE MADE A BETTER CHOICE AT THE TIME? "



Let's think seriously about this question...


Could you have made a better choice at the time? I have asked myself the same question a million

times and you know what keeps coming back to me, as an answer? NO.

I have gone through all the different scenarios that may have given me a different life and somehow,

I keep coming up with the same answer...

I made the choices I made, because they were correct at the time for my heart, my spirit and my

mind.

If you are Straight-Minded, then you never need to question your sanity.

If you are with a good Spirit, then you need not question if your motives were less than Pure.

Finally, if your Heart is clean, then there is no need to question Love and Honorability.

Once I realized those facts, I then came to the conclusion that my choices were perfect for me,

although the outcome were not the kind I had anticipated.


Many times, the choices we thought were wrong, were actually the perfect choice for us to learn

something valuable. It's different for each of us, so I can only speak for myself...

The most important lesson, I learned was to become Forgiving!

The other lesson is No human can be trusted!

Another lesson is to Remember Who I am!

At the risk of sounding pompous, humans rarely impress me and when they do? It is short lived.

I do not ask myself that question anymore about past decisions, but I am still careful on present

and future decisions. At my age, I don't care to learn about life too much more!

I have learned all the necessary evil, I can withstand...


The one other thing, I must mention is the fact, that most humans do not listen to reason.

They are defiant and ignorant. They are mostly trying to numb their pain rather than deal with it like

a good soldier! No, I cannot blame them. Just because I am not like that, it does not make them

wrong and I correct.

I have my set of very Strict Rules for myself, that most would not consider for their lives!

Wherever each of us stand with Decision Making, I just want to encourage you Not to pity yourself

for the outcome of what you think was an incorrect decision.

Try to Learn from it and Grow.

You might surprise yourself and see Someone, you should have loved and protected since the

beginning... Yourself!